It is the last Foodie Friday before Christmas, and I thought I would share my family's recipe for Million-Dollar Fudge. If I am being transparent, I haven't made fudge for years. The problem with fudge is that I eat it, like all of it. Eating fudge is how I went from just over 100 lbs. to way over 100 lbs. Well, that and a few medical issues/medications, but the fudge definitely helped the number on that scale climb. So, I don't make fudge anymore. It's too much of a temptation.
When I began teaching at Abraxas in Forest County, PA, it was my first time living alone. I was young, overwhelmed with my new job and living situation, and often exhausted. I began taking medicine to control my colitis and reduce the inflammation in my body. Steroids make you hungry, and long-term steroid use packs on the pounds quickly. Combine that with not knowing how to cook, not really caring to cook for one, and not wanting to extend the energy to cook proper meals; you have a recipe for a fat-ass disaster.
On Sunday evenings, I would return to my lonely little cottage in the middle of the Alleghany National Forest, and out of boredom, I would make a pan of fudge. I got really good at making fudge. It was my first attempt at candy-making, and I took it seriously. I would put the fudge in a special container, an old tin with a nostalgic winter farm scene. That container would go into the refrigerator on Sunday night, and the fudge would be my weekly food source.
I remember visiting home on a weekend several months into my first teaching job. After months of eating fudge and being on low-dose steroids, the effects were beginning to show. I equivocate it to the freshman fifteen; it was just a few years later. I was in my flannel pajamas, going upstairs ahead of my mom. My mom announced with a cackling laugh, "Weiner, your ass looks as wide as an ax handle! You better cut back on the fudge and watch your weight!" Rich, coming from a woman who is supposedly self-conscious of her weight and was overly sensitive to my dad's comments about her weight. As was often the case in our family dynamic, when a weakness was bared, it was used to one's advantage. This comment was just the first of many hurtful comments about my appearance that went on for years.
So, that was the end of my fudge-making. Despite cutting out the sweets, eating better, exercising, and eventually trying every diet medication on the market, the damage was done. The steroids were necessary to keep things in check, and the weight stayed on. However, I remember how delicious and creamy the fudge tasted. To this day, it remains a fond memory, although tainted with negativity.
My grandmother's recipe for Million-Dollar Fudge is one of the best I have ever tasted. It's rich, creamy, and delicious. When I think of the perfect fudge recipe, I think of my Gram's Million Dollar Fudge. Although I refuse to make it, trust me, dear reader, it is a wonderful holiday treat. A bit of advice from twenty-something me: don't make it a food staple. Insert a wink. Fudge is not part of the food pyramid. Sigh.
Million Dollar Fudge
4 1/2 Cups Granulated Sugar
1 Can Carnation Evaporated Milk
1/4 Cup Butter
2 16 oz. packages Nestle Toll House Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
1 Pint Marshmallow Creme
1 tsp. Vanilla Extract
1 Cup Nuts (Optional) - I never add nuts
Boil the sugar, milk, and butter over low heat for eight minutes. Remove from the stove. Add the chocolate chips, marshmallow creme, and vanilla extract. Beat by hand using a sturdy spatula until all is melted and combined. Pour the mixture onto a buttered cookie sheet, spread evenly, and allow to cool completely. Once cooled, cut into bite-size pieces, store in an airtight container, and store in the refrigerator if eaten within a week. Freeze if not being used right away. This recipe makes 5 lbs.
On this last Friday before Christmas, stay safe, be smart, eat delicious treats in moderation, enjoy the holiday, use gentle words when speaking to others, and treat others respectfully. Making someone feel bad to make yourself feel good is not a suitable coping mechanism. Also, keep washing your hands.
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