I Have Bad Ideas

Here I am hanging curtain rods, being all handy and precise. Look at the use of that level!

As Thanksgiving quickly approaches, it is clear that once again, I have overestimated my abilities and capacity to get things done and underestimated the amount of time it takes to complete my "vision." A few months ago, I began a minor overhaul of our downstairs. For whatever reason, I always start from the back of the house and work my way forward. I clean from the laundry room to the bathroom, to the keeping room, to the dining room, to the kitchen, and end with the home office and living room. My minor overhaul has followed the same pattern. I did my laundry room a few years ago, the bathroom last year, and the keeping room a few months ago. Now, I am working on the dining room.

I had grand visions of completing my dining room and kitchen for Thanksgiving. However, I will consider it a success if I finish the dining room in time for the big day. I painted the room from top to bottom. I thought it would go quickly because of all the windows. I thought wrong. The time it took me to cut in around all the windows and trim work was tedious. I did the first coat, went on vacation, and came home to do the second coat, only to discover that I couldn't wait a week between coats and have it come out evenly. So, a third coat was needed. Sigh.

I painted the floor tiles because I hate the pinkish-tinted tile. Jordan told me I needed to paint the grout lines because "it would add something to the room." So I sat on my now old, flat bottom and painted grout lines only to cover most of the floor with a new oriental rug. I like the rug; the grout lines add nothing to the room. Lesson: don't take decorating advice from a moody teenager who makes fun of you, your flat, old bottom, and your willingness to listen to their bad advice.

With the painting completed, I thought the room would come together quickly. Haha! That is a joke. Over the weekend, I decided to refinish my dining room table. The final kiss of death on the table finish was when Jordan set a hot iron on the table and walked away for a few minutes. There was a very noticeable burn mark in the finish. It was not cute or charming, like the paint marks or scratches created during childhood from art projects. I got the grand idea to strip the finish, sand the table, and refinish it, thinking it would take me a day. I put the last coat of polyurethane on the tabletop yesterday. I bought the wrong size curtain rods to add to the self-imposed chaos. My sheers are an inch too long; the ribbon I purchased to outline my custom drapes is not thirty yards, but three, and my vision for reimagining an old table into a matching pair of sideboards will take more time and effort than I currently have. Oh, let us not forget that the stupid window between the dining room and the sunroom will be covered with a custom chalkboard on the dining room side, and bookshelves on the sunroom side aren't even started yet. Sigh, I am so bad at time management.

Let me also add that I waited until the absolute busiest time of our business year to begin this project, and you can quickly see how poorly planned this project really is. I am a cotton-headed ninny-muggins. By the time I put in eight to ten hours in the studio, I don't feel like doing anything at the house. It also doesn't help that it gets dark at 4:30, and I have been going to bed at 7:30. I genuinely have very old-lady-like behaviors. I am obnoxious, open mouth, yawning if I am still awake at 9:00. Sadly, I can still remember being able to stay up all night working on a project and still having the energy to complete a full day the next day. Where, oh where, has that ability gone? It's probably gone down the same path as my metabolism and growth hormones. Sigh.

I will only have curtains on my windows for Thanksgiving because of my talented friend, Janet. Janet graciously agreed to hem my too-long sheers and sew my custom drapes. I had grand visions of sewing my curtains and the professional results that would ensue, only to realize I was truly disillusioned about time and abilities. Janet will indeed create beautiful, professional quality drapes, while mine would look like a kindergartner with ADD lost focus halfway through and cut all kinds of corners to get it done. Or, more accurately, they would look like a heap of fabric stuffed in a tote that is never to be completed. I have a lot of totes.

Despite the incompleteness of my dining room decor, I plan to cook a Thanksgiving feast to wow my family and friends. The Bibbed Wonder fusses at me "to take it easy" on Thanksgiving. He keeps sending me ads for made-to-order meals and restaurants that offer Thanksgiving dinner and has even declared we should order Chinese food. The Bean finally told him to stop with his campaign for an easy Thanksgiving. She stated, "You know mom will do what she wants. Just stop." I want to cook. I like to cook the Thanksgiving meal. It makes me feel close to my dad, builds memories, and makes me happy. I will be exhausted and perhaps a bit grumpy afterward, but it will all be worth it.

So, as much as I hate to admit it, I created a poor plan with poor timing. My holiday will not be held in the perfect environment I imagined. However, the feeling of the holiday will still be there. Unless Eric makes me order Chinese food, then there will be a new level of moodiness he has not experienced, and he has experienced a lot with me in the last twenty-two years. Martha Stewert will be disappointed with my acceptance of my reality and lack of integrity in completing my project promptly. Sigh, I can strive for perfection for Christmas...or maybe after the New Year...definitely by spring.

On this snowy November day, stay safe, be smarter than I am, don't start projects that are too big to complete during your busiest season, don't tell Martha Stewert I let her down, and keep washing your hands.